The other day I went to pick Kelly up from school and I am not kidding... the boy wasn't in the car for more than 5 minutes when he farted (sorry but you know I'll talk about anything and everything...) It seriously reeked so bad that I rolled the window down and looked over at his angelic face. He was trying so hard to look innocent. It was an award winning look. "Eww... GROSS! What crawled up your butt and died? A dog?" I asked. He looked over at me like I had lost my mind and said, "Get real mom, my butt's too little, a dog would never fit."
Does he sound a little too much like me??? I think so too... I lost it!! I just died laughing.
So I asked about a smaller animal, I think a hamster...(yes I am aware of all the horror stories but I knew he wouldn't so I didn't feel bad asking him.) and he made his fist into a tiny little hole and said, "nothing crawled up there mom cause it's my butt is only this big"
I mumbled something about my foot going up his butt... but I digress. I then proceeded to ask about a worm or another large bug. He was so shocked that I would even ask him that "because don't I know that worms don't smell that bad when they die?"
He said all this with a straight face. It was so priceless.
Ah the joys of raising little boys... That is a conversation I NEVER thought I'd have with anyone.
2 comments:
If I've learned one thing about that boy, it's that when you plan on being in an enclosed space with him, you need a thigh holster containing a military issue gas mask, filter, and respirator. You should also be practiced in putting it all on within about 20 seconds, because shortly after that, the chemical agent will start to attack your nervous system and you will lose consciousness....and then your face melts.
Oh, the things Kelly says! You are in for a life time of entertainment with that one! He kills me! It will be interesting to see what Cam is like as he gets bigger.
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